How to Talk With Angry Kids – A Lesson In Body Language

It was the time when we started receiving complaints of our son fighting with his playmates at his preschool; I knew I had to be more attentive and watchful towards him. This was the time when my son was also learning to cope up with his anger, and he needed his parent’s help the most. As anxious as I was through this difficult time, I found sound advice and support in preschool development program by QualityKG.

Here’s what I learned:

Talking It Out

What I first started to do is to calm my son down and talk it out, instead of scolding him for his anger. I knew I had time to help him with his anger before this behavior became out of control. There was something very peculiar which I and my husband had discovered to manage our son’s anger. We gave a name to anger (we called it dragon) and drew a picture of it. Whenever we used to get signals of our son’s anger, we used to alert him accordingly and told him that the dragon is coming out of him. Such reminders made him realize that he was about to act up.

Affectionate Understanding

Giving comfort and affection to my son during his anger actually helped a lot. I had noticed that somehow my son was looking for more attention, and that is why his emotions are bursting as anger. He felt loved and accepted when we used to sit and talk about his anger in an affectionate manner.

Praising

I praise my son a lot for his good behavior. While stopping them from getting angry gives temporary relief, praising them when they are calm gives a long term result.

Self-control

My son, like every other child, mimics the elders who he is surrounded by. As parents, we made sure that we shouldn’t model wrong ways of showing anger in front of our son. We applied positive ways of getting away from frustrating situations, and our son learned them quickly by his copying skills.

Keeping Notes of Anger Triggers

Eventually, I started to keep notes of my son’s anger triggers. I actually made a list of situations, which made him annoyed. I started working on them with my son and talked to him about how he can walk away from such situations.

Recognizing the Anger

My efforts of helping my son to cope up with his anger were based on his body language like a change in facial expression, clenched fists, tensed or shivering body, verbal outbursts and tendency to hit out. I often spoke to his preschool teachers about these changes in him while he is angry. His teachers also used to pay attention to his mood swings and took good care of him.

Bottom Line

I am thankful to the school nurse, preschool pediatrician, and psychologist who were active with my son during his crisis period. I am relieved that I send my son to a school that follows high Preschool accreditation standard laid down by QualityKG. A combined effort by the preschool and us has helped my son in managing his anger and in channelizing it in a positive manner.

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